Talking with someone recently has opened up my eyes to a lot of things. Not that they were closed, but I could feel them getting to that point. I could feel myself losing myself again. It's silly. I know who I am. I know my flaws, my strengths, my quirks, my morals, my likes and dislikes. Yet sometimes I hide them, or blur them, alter them a little. I'm not perfect, but here's something I have over a lot of others: I know what really makes me who I am. I'm okay with laying it all on the table, and if I'm not good enough for someone to care about or be interested in, then that's okay. I have a lot of qualities that a lot of people find weird. I have anxiety. I stress. But I know how to manage it and all I can do is live life the way that works for me.
These messages back and forth and a possible future real friendship is something nice to look forward to. I'm getting to know someone who has a lot in common with me, but is also different. The things we have in common are the important things. The things we feel hold us back from being good friends with people.
I don't know how to explain it, but I don't necessarily need to. It's just nice to feel relieved that another human being can relate to what you thought made you an outsider.
2 comments:
I am smiling. I love you. I have told you all my 'imperfections' and ik that you know what i mean what I tell you stuff. You don't think I am weird. If I tell you TMI, you don't care. And, to top it off. Our husbands like eachother enough to talk at 0600! I hope you love me enough to visit me in jail, because Madalyn just dumped lotion everywhere after I have just cleaned the floor!
HA. Why didn't my email friggin notify me of your comments? :[ I'm just now getting them. I love you too. It's like when you meet someone and then three days later you're saying, "I love you" and your family and friends say, "How?! You just met! Take things nice and slow" Hahaha. Except we've known of each other's existence for a long time, and I told you like everything about me (in short story form) openly and comfortably, so I instantly felt like you were more than a stranger. I think you're my long lost mind twin.
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